The Little Couple Colvin Connection

Say what?  For those of you who know who I’m referring to, this is probably perplexing and for those of you who have no effing idea who or what The Little Couple is, you’re probably wondering why I’m drinking and writing.  Well, for one, it’s Saturday, my husband is playing poker at the club, the kids are asleep and the only pressing task is either finishing cleaning the kids’ bathroom which I hastily started as they all bathed together.  Yes, I said ALL. They ALL took a tubbie. Isn’t that cute. Or maybe a little creepy depending on your level of judginess.  Suck it if you are having creepy thoughts. Maybe your kids are pervs, but mine aren’t.  Yet.  There’s plenty of time for them to perv out though.  I’ll keep you posted.

Well isn’t this taking a turn for the worse!  It’s going to get worse before it gets better so prepare yourselves.   So, back to The Little Couple.  They have a reality show on TLC and I love me some little peeps.  Just ask my girlfriends about the Broadway singer I once dated who came to Seattle for a weekend and took me to lunch with his little friend.  His little friend who he didn’t tell me was little.  I was a little awestruck. Imagine later the horror of finding out that this little friend passed him a big package while we were at lunch. A big package that surfaced later in the night as we were getting ready to go out.  A big package of coke. As in Cocaine.  Dead freaking serious. He asked me if me and my friends liked to “party,” and like the dancing at the after club till my buzz wore off and my feet were throbbing party girl I was, I happily proclaimed that “uh yeah! Duh.”  Who knew he meant partay as in partake in illegal substances. I almost had a panic attack. I literally went into my bedroom and thought about calling my mom first and police second.  (Mom to give me the kick in the ass to do the right thing kind of slap in the face I needed and police to come arrest this criminal!) Now I know not all little people are coke horrors. Bill and Jen are so not like that!  Bill is a business owner and Jen is a neonatologist.  And what do we have in common? Well, Jen and I have the same name, yay!  AND!  And Bill and Jen have the same aqua pillow shams on their bed as Macey has on hers.  No shit!

And you know what else?  Bill and Jen adopted a little boy who is from the same orphanage as Macey.  The same freaking one people.  That’s crazy talk.  Seriously it is!  While there aren’t many accurate statistics, due in full to China’s lack of honesty and communication about such, I did find that in 2009 and 2010, the percent of submissions into the social welfare institute in Inner Mongolia was only about .7-.1% of the total of all submissions in all provinces combined. Submissions = children who entered into the care of the SWI.  So, if rate of kids in = rate of kids out then there aren’t too many kids adopted out of Inner Mongolia when you look at the total kids who are adopted from China. I would tend to agree with that.  Nobody on our trip had even heard of IM.  And on all of the web related sites I’m on and/or belong to, I only know of 5 other kids who came out of IM in the 6 months prior to/post Macey’s adoption.

So, what does this mean?  Well, on the upcoming episodes they will show Bill and Jen’s journey to pick up their new son.  They will travel to Beijing then to Hohhot and on to Guangzhou.  Just like Parker and Jen!  And Chase and Colby and Macey!  I have no idea what they will/will not show but if you’re at all interested at a glimpse of where we are and what we did, please tune in. Wednesdays at 10/9 central.  I hope they show the good, the bad and the ugly.  The best part of the good is the gift of welcoming a new little one into your family.  A new little one who is scared and a little broken and very, very sad.  The bad is the official side of things where the officials count their cash before asking you the most asinine questions ever spoken. Such as “are you satisfied with your daughter?”  Um, no, actually, I would like one who is potty trained and doesn’t hate us?  Got any of those in your trunk, asshole? Blech.  And the ugly is all that comes with being among a communist society.  I am proud to be an American and am honored to have given my daughter the ability to become a free citizen of this beautiful, beautiful land.

Speaking of beautiful, The Little Couple’s little guy is absolutely beautiful and perfect and he, along with a book I’m reading, Carried In Our Hearts,  has gotten me thinking about our future which I will write about in my next post!






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